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Sorry

from Malintent by Malintent

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All I really want is for this stupid feud to end. Is it really all that crazy that i want to make amends? We don't have to be enemies; I would rather be your friend. If you can just forgive me, then I'll stop playing pretend. Your voice still painfully resides deep inside my ears. "You should have seen this coming" is sometimes all I can hear. Well, how could I have seen this coming with no clues to see? It's obvious that this is easy for you, but so much harder for me.

Bucks County and deja vu. I wanted you back but you said you're through. My body was older, but my mind was young, and the break apart forced it to catch up.

I admit I've made mistakes; I didn't think things through. But, believe me when I say that I never meant to hurt you. I've come to terms that maybe we were never meant to be. And so I'll bite the bullet. I'll swallow my pride. I'll step up to you and apologize. I'm sorry for my actions. I'm sorry for my mood. I'm sorry for all the things I said. I'm sorry and I miss you.

Bucks County and deja vu. I wanted you back, but you said you're through. My body was older, but my mind was young, and the break apart forced it to catch up. I'm haunted and kept wide awake with the tribulations of my past mistakes. I'm terrified for my own sake. My patience and will are about to break. (I can't sleep with these thoughts inside my head. They play through over and over again. And I can't stop thinking about my past and wishing I can be sixteen again.

I can say I hate you. I can say I'm through. I can say you mean nothing to me and I'm over you. I can say all these things until the day I die. But I'm telling you right now that it would all be one big lie.
I'm sorry for my actions and I'm sorry for my mood. I'm sorry for all the things I said. I'm sorry and I miss you.

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from Malintent, released July 16, 2012

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Malintent Westfield, New Jersey

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